You are currently browsing the monthly archive for January 2010.

i haven’t written in a while and I really should do better.  I’m slightly terrified of an upcoming proposal I’m trying to write.  It’s due VERY soon and it’s for a plenary session which would mean everyone at the conference would be there. Ha.  I would probably die if I had to give it.  Literally curl up on the floor and die when Susan Foster or Michal Kobialka ask me a question about my use of Foucault.  TERRIFYING.

Anyway,  I need very badly to go on a diet and work out.  I’m not so thrilled with my appearance right now.  Plus I need to stay in shape for when I go back to the dance world.  It’s really not enough to take one class a week and expect that to be my exercise routine.  Starting tomorrow I am doing abs and cardio and perhaps even. dun dun dun…some weight training.  Those words are not my friends.  WEIGHT TRAINING.

Ok my other goal is to start going to bookstores and reading lots of philosophy and critical theory.  I started thinking about essentialism today and how terrible I think it is and I started wondering if I could even spot it anymore.  I mean I could in obvious places, but I’m just scared of becoming less and less sharp.  Is there a way to just freeze my brain so when I want to use it in that capacity again, or even a greater one, that I can just access it all?  NOPE.  So I need to keep that exercised too.

I guess the moral of this post is that I’ve been lax, losing form and letting my brain shut down too much (although I always said I wanted that. ha.)  I had planned this really cool post on the polymorphous, dynamic, and multidimensional thing we call “hate”.  I will have to put that on hold until later, perhaps tomorrow.  Anyway, I’ll leave y’all with an interesting video.

So I’ve been thinking thinking thinking about my next choreographic venture.  I’ve been throwing around concepts in my head for the last few days but nothing has really stuck yet.  My first idea is to use the theme of my ACDF piece from last year, “(Re)place; Place; Dis/place”

My idea here would be to use this 8 minute piece as the third and final act to the evening-lengthed work.  The other two acts would still deal with themes of queer desire but perhaps look at it from different angles, different stories, and different time periods.  I really like this idea because I feel like there is more to be done with my piece.  It’s a KILLER though so I feel like the people who do the other two acts MIGHT not want to be in the 3rd act.  Otherwise, they better get in shape…including myself if I end up doing it…which i’d really rather not.

My other ideas and options revolve around ideas of isolation, death, legacy, and virtual connectivity.  I want to work to add my own theoretical voice to these topics.  I know Sokolow did “Rooms” back in the 50s, but times have changed and with the internet and a world increasingly globalized, vehicles and manifestations of isolation have shifted.  I think it would be a VERY interesting place to go with dancers and spend some time incubating and researching.  Below is a pic of the Limon company doing “Rooms”.  It’s actually Sokolow’s 100th birthday this year so it would be fitting and poignant to revamp such a canonic staple in modern dance.

Photo courtesy of

My LAST idea is to rework either one or more stories from GLBT literature and give them new significance, and, using metaphors from the story building and evoking new meaning.  My initial ideas for stories are Maurice, The Well of Loneliness, Rubyfruit Jungle, The Price of Salt, and Giovanni’s Room are just a few ideas I have.

I have a long way to go before I figure out what I want to do exactly.  Narrowing down to three things is a good start for me!!

OK time to watch Marley and Me.

I watch quite a few newstype programs in the morning.  CNN, the View, the Today Show.  Watching them this morning you wouldn’t think this is the start of what could be a landmark case in GLBT history.  Most of the news was surrounding Harry Reid’s comment about President Obama’s election.  You can read an article about his apology here through CBS NEWS.  The other big news story was about NBC’s seemingly monumental decision to move former Tonight Show host Jay Leno back to his slot which Conan O’Brian is now filling.  I mean, how INCREDIBLY important, no?  Look, I know we don’t live in a posthomophobic world, but are we SO incredibly invisible?  I’m actually watching Ellen right now.  Ellen, an out public figure who lives in California and has publicly supported GLBT issues in the past, hasn’t even mentioned it.  Maybe I’m just overly anxious about this trial.  My support is 1, this blog, and 2, I’m wearing one of my pride t shirts.  I wish I were in San Francisco right now, though.

As much as I question assimilationist forms of thought, the corporatization of homosexual identities and families, and notions of “everlasting long”, I feel this important of a case should be publicized.  True the Federal Court ruled against television broadcasts, but the proceedings will be put up on youtube after the fact.  I’ll be uploading those videos to this blog so you can easily access them or you can just watch them and subscribe along with me.  I am “pro choice” as far as marriage goes.  I don’t know if anyone’s coined that phrase as far as same sex marriage is concerned.  The legal rights of marriage shouldn’t be denied to people based on sexual orientation or gender.  I don’t think the purpose of this blog is to question gay marriage as much as it is to increase visibility of GLBTQ issues.  I mean..seriously Jay Leno?   That’s one person, maybe 3 with Jimmy Kimmel and Conan, but these Prop 8 proceedings affect millions of people.  It will be an important precedent, unquestionably.  Perhaps the media is responding to the television ban, but they’re hardly even advertising that.

The news stories today surrounding Reid’s comment illustrate firmly that electing a black president does not suddenly project the United States into a postracial world, but at least there is conversation about it.  Nothing can change without discourse, action, public knowledge.

My incitement to action is this:  Talk to your friends, email your moms, your dads, your best friends, your teachers, your students, your coworkers about this trial.  Get everyone following it.  Make those youtube numbers skyrocket.  If you’re in the San Francisco area, go out and get involved with the trial with protests.  Let’s make this public, in the homes of the people who DON’T WANT TO KNOW because it’s too uncomfortable for them.

This case is bound to head to the U. S. Supreme Court but a public interest and following now is sure to put pressure on judges and will increase momentum going into such a trial.  According to CNN this trial has been dubbed the Brown vs. Board of Education of this generation.  I do hope the climactic moments are at least publicized, debated, and discussed in high amounts across the country and the world.  Just DO SOMETHING.  And yes, I know that goes for me too.  I’ll keep trying to do it through art.


The U.S. Supreme Court has suspended the youtube airing for now until they hear the opposition’s arguments. Thanks to the HRC Facebook page and Google News.  This ban is in effect until Wednesday, the 13th.

HRC Facebook Page

OK so here’s my BOSFRONZ blog post.  Prepare to cry…that’s more of a warning to myself because really no one else cries at these things besides Jeff and John.  In a nutshell 2009 was the year of the eyebrows.  I don’t know exactly what that means and I don’t have the desire to try to prove it, although I’m sure I could.  All I know is that I had eyebrows all of 2009, and so did my friends.

For me, personally, 2009 was meteoric considering accomplishments.  I am so incredibly lucky to have had such amazing opportunities.  Things I was able to do: went to China, lived in NYC for a month and a half, performed at the Northrop, showed choreography at ACDFA and was extremely well received, and countless other things that I’m sort of blanking on right now.

So I thought I’d go through these photos and sort of non-chronologically explain the year.  I’ll go top to bottom left to right.

1.  China was INCREDIBLE. This pic was taken with all the company, guests, and spouses who were along for the ride.  What an AMAZING adventure.  We literally flew over the world to get there and back.  Without a doubt the memories from this trip will never leave me.

2.  OF COURSE if you’ve ever seen my besti, Jeff, and my wall to wall on facebook, you might notice the trend of starting every statement, question, remark, and basically anything with “remember whens”.   I mean, it’s impossible to remember something that hasn’t happened yet, but it’s not about “making sense”.

3.  This was Ra’mon and I’s first night in New York!  We were in Times Square looking for someplace to eat and he stopped me and said, ok before we do anything else we need to take a picture here. 🙂 So cute and happy.  We look like we belong there, no?

4.  This was my FIRST Limon company experience back in March.  The dancers were staying at the Westin and us U of Mers went to hang out and take them out for a night on the town the Minnesota (which equals freezing, naturally) way.

5.  So this is really cut off but it’s John Sand and I posing at the Citypages photobooth on the 4th of July at Too Much Love.  Clearly we were dressing down that night and thinking rather conservatively.  Also, we were by no means drunk.

6.  Another John Sand and Brent Radeke classic.  The U Otter was the perfect night before I headed to NYC.  We sang karaoke and drank whisky cokes and generally had a brilliant time, like always.  What I remember most from that night is my clever tactics in avoiding a trip to White Caste and instead directing hunger toward the wonderful and always open McDonalds.

7.  FORD HALL. Besti Jeff and I posed in front of the infamous and fordable Ford Hall on the Fierce Purple Cardigan holiday known as Gay Easter.  Of course no GE could be complete without a trip to Noodles.  We walked all over campus but eventually we ate and finished off the night watching Jesus Christ Super Star for Pjsesus.

8.  (2nd row furtherst right)  2009 UDT and I believe it was opening night.  Duncan, Kat, and I were sporting our fierce costumes for Shapiro and Smith’s “A Moment Before”.  Starr’s in the background making fun of our wedgies, I’m sure.  An amazing cast, an amazing dance, and an amazing UDT.  I miss dancing with everyone back home more than a little bit.

9.  My favorite part of the summer is my “vacation” up north to Nisswa.  Riding on the jetski with my cousins and getting tan in my tiny swimsuit was the goal and i SUCCEEDED.  I also succeeded at getting drunk by noon and taking shots with my mother.

10.  Biggie Slims and I rockin out the NYE 2009 at the Crystal Ball. OH WHAT A NIGHT.  Let’s just say that BEP song was pretty true 4sr.

11.  Me and my hero, Ananya on my last day at work at ADT.  Miss her and that work and those amazing women and doing some social justice but trying to forge my own path now.

12.  Jesi and I were 2cool4school eating lunch on the steps of the Met.  Gossip Girl XOXO.  That’s right, I’m the queen bee.

13.  (bottom left)  Harry Potter 6 was probably one of THE highlights of the summer for me.  Dressed up and going to the midnight showing.  I swear I went with the most creative group of costumes.  I was the least creative, but I at least wasn’t like Ron or Harry or something.  IT WAS SO GOOD.

14.  Honestly, 2009 (and part of 2008) were the years of Missa Brevis.  I have been doing Limon work now for over a year. CRAZY.  It brought me to China, though so I can’t really complain…at all.  The part in the pic is from the sextet.

15.  STATE FAIR DUH.  Me and the ladies went to the state fair and stuffed ourselves with entirely too much food and I ruined a pair of shorts dancing and we got SOAKED on a water ride.  One of THE BEST days of the year.  I am definitely coming back next year for some more food and laughs.

16.  (Last but definitely not least) Transmission.  Kara, John and I (the sprfshn trio) invaded Jager for 80s night.  Of course we were the most fabulous people there, but we didn’t win the Madonna discography for best costume.  Not cool.  Of course we went to McDonalds after and of course we had a fabulous time.  There’s always drama, of course, with some ex or another showing up but what’s fun without a little FLARE?  (If I don’t stop writing soon I’m going to throw up)  I was clearly an 80s dancer and John was some country star or something.

OK those were my 16 pictures.  2009 is done and i’m ovr it.


In 2010 John Sand WILL watch Cats.

So I am starting to think about spring and summer, naturally, because there was a snow storm yesterday.  If I could just wear this every day that would be perfect.  Or something like this.  It’s from the SS 2010 Burberry Prorsum and I WANT it.  OK, So I’ll stop pretending like I could ever afford that.  I personally can’t wait for the spring.  This whole winter thing is pretty, like always, but the snow is already starting to get dirty, black, and compacted.  The soft, fluffy stuff, for those of you who don’t know (and I am only pretending to think that people outside of my immediate friend group who have lived in the wintery wonderland forever) only stays around for about 3 hours.  After that, people drive and destroy it all.  Argyle was slightly different.  At least the fields and snow drifts remained relatively untouched.  It’s prettier, but also MUCH colder there.  I do not envy the -50 weather that’s been recorded up there already this year.

Here are some “friendly tips” for winter in the Midwestern Tundra.

1. Fight the weather with sprfshn.  Fur is in, so wear it.  It’s warm.  OK I’m not going to be friends with PETA anytime soon, but I like eating chicken and turkey anyway.

2.  Always turn your wheel INTO the spin.  I don’t know if they actually teach this anywhere besides NW Minnesota, but if you’re driving and you start to go into a spin, turn the wheel WITH the spin.  It’s the only way you’ll get out.  It feels counter intuitive, but it will SAVE your life.

3.  Drink lots of STARBYS.  Nothing keeps you warm like a Venti quad nonfat caramel macchiato.  If you like skinny vanilla latte’s like JOHN, that’s fine too.  Just keep yourself hydrated and warm.  Also, carry around those travel mugs.

4.  If you get frostbite, sit on your hands until you can feel them again.  I know it hurts, but you have to do it.  Heating pads work too.  If it’s -30 degrees outside, try not to stay outside for more than 3 minutes at a time. (this is not a scientific number, i’m just guestimating, naturally.)

5.  The most important thing to do in the winter is to exercise.  Sure your merona wool sweater will stretch and give, but your t shirt and tanktops in the spring and summer probably won’t.  Also, exercising fights seasonal depression…it’s a proven fact, people.  Just do Yoga or take a walk or do 30 minutes on the elliptical.  The naturalized impulse is to hibernate.  FIGHT IT. We aren’t bears…

OK, Martha is on now.  Speaking of YOGA, they’re doing a yoga show today.  Martha opened the show in a headstand.  Everyone’s showing their favorite pose.  Here’s mine.

So it’s 2010. Woh, right? When did that happen? Not sure. Well I guess it happened at midnight on Jan 1st…but yeah. I spent NYE at International Market Square dancing and partying the night away with Jessica and Ra’mon. It was probably the first NYE that I haven’t been upset and I can genuinely say I had an amazing time. It was my last big night in Minneapolis, at least as a full resident. That’s correct, I have finally moved away from the Minni apple. Weird, no? After 6 years or so in that city I’ve graduated further east. I’m in Milwaukee now living with Ra’mon and LOVING IT. OK, today it’s snowing, but I’m looking for jobs and emailing dance companies right now. It’s sort of exciting to get out and actually take control of my future. Does Milwaukee have a bigger dance scene than Minneapolis? No…but it probably has more opportunities. I wasn’t getting what I wanted/needed out of the Mpls dance stuff, so hopefully here I can dance and choreograph a little more. Maybe show my stuff some places and start my own company, or at least my own dance collective. That’s the plan at least.

I am slightly concerned about the whole dance world, though. I’m not 100 percent sure it’s what I want. I feel pretty strongly that the sort of dance I want to do is not as radical as my political mind would like it to be. It’s hard. I don’t want to do the super post modern, basically physical theatre dance that is stereotypically political. Why can’t physical, “pretty” dance be political? It can…I will make it so.

So I’m GOING TO BLOG MORE. I don’t have much else going on right now anyway. I saw this yesterday on my friend Kara’s wall after our friend Amy posted it on hers. It’s a mashup of the top 25 songs of 2009. It’s pretty damn brilliant. It took A LOT OF TIME. HOLY SHIT I JUST HEARD THAT WE LIVE IN A POST FEMINIST WORLD. Please don’t watch Tyra Banks…it’s AWFUL. OK…sorry for that tangent. Ok, here is the link. And I think I’m gonna be done blogging for today.