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So I am starting to think about spring and summer, naturally, because there was a snow storm yesterday.  If I could just wear this every day that would be perfect.  Or something like this.  It’s from the SS 2010 Burberry Prorsum and I WANT it.  OK, So I’ll stop pretending like I could ever afford that.  I personally can’t wait for the spring.  This whole winter thing is pretty, like always, but the snow is already starting to get dirty, black, and compacted.  The soft, fluffy stuff, for those of you who don’t know (and I am only pretending to think that people outside of my immediate friend group who have lived in the wintery wonderland forever) only stays around for about 3 hours.  After that, people drive and destroy it all.  Argyle was slightly different.  At least the fields and snow drifts remained relatively untouched.  It’s prettier, but also MUCH colder there.  I do not envy the -50 weather that’s been recorded up there already this year.

Here are some “friendly tips” for winter in the Midwestern Tundra.

1. Fight the weather with sprfshn.  Fur is in, so wear it.  It’s warm.  OK I’m not going to be friends with PETA anytime soon, but I like eating chicken and turkey anyway.

2.  Always turn your wheel INTO the spin.  I don’t know if they actually teach this anywhere besides NW Minnesota, but if you’re driving and you start to go into a spin, turn the wheel WITH the spin.  It’s the only way you’ll get out.  It feels counter intuitive, but it will SAVE your life.

3.  Drink lots of STARBYS.  Nothing keeps you warm like a Venti quad nonfat caramel macchiato.  If you like skinny vanilla latte’s like JOHN, that’s fine too.  Just keep yourself hydrated and warm.  Also, carry around those travel mugs.

4.  If you get frostbite, sit on your hands until you can feel them again.  I know it hurts, but you have to do it.  Heating pads work too.  If it’s -30 degrees outside, try not to stay outside for more than 3 minutes at a time. (this is not a scientific number, i’m just guestimating, naturally.)

5.  The most important thing to do in the winter is to exercise.  Sure your merona wool sweater will stretch and give, but your t shirt and tanktops in the spring and summer probably won’t.  Also, exercising fights seasonal depression…it’s a proven fact, people.  Just do Yoga or take a walk or do 30 minutes on the elliptical.  The naturalized impulse is to hibernate.  FIGHT IT. We aren’t bears…

OK, Martha is on now.  Speaking of YOGA, they’re doing a yoga show today.  Martha opened the show in a headstand.  Everyone’s showing their favorite pose.  Here’s mine.

Things I have realized in the past 24 hours.

1. I don’t need or want a job. (this is false, at least the first half.)

2. I want to wear this every day for the rest of summer.

3. Hedgehogs don’t look like sonic, at all.

4. I’m starting a book and my lack of job will help me in writing.  Maybe I’ll get an advance. ha.  If you want to be in my book, you better be cool.  I take bribes.

5. It’s really hot in Minnesota during August and I don’t do well with humidity.

It’s time again for back to school shopping. I’ll be heading to the Mall of America this coming Thursday to shop for my new spring clothes. I probably won’t get much, but a few essentials are necessary for this semester/spring, I feel.

For men, it is slightly imperative to have a good bootcut jean. I know men don’t get as many options as the females when it comes to denim, or really anything else in clothing for that matter, but a good pair of denim is worth a little spending money. I have a few suggestions.

For those of you who can spare the extra money, and are willing to pay a little more for your jeans (or a lot more for that matter), you should look into the wonderful Rock & Republic denim selection. These jeans are tailored to the tall, thin man — and if you are such a man, you understand how difficult it can be to find a good pair of denim. If you live in the Minneapolis-St. Paul neighborhood, you can find a nice selection at Metropark in Mall of America. At this same store, one can find the True Religion denim line. The last three higher-priced denim lines which I will recommend are Diesel, Replay, and 7 for All Mankind. These last three have Jeans for all body types. Diesel and Replay are Italian Brands and have many of the latest trends. You can find a good skinny jean in any of these locations.

For the man with the lower budget, which is most people I know, including myself, I recommend denim that fits similarly to these jeans. You can normally find pretty quality denim at the Buckle. You don’t have to buy a pair of Guess Jeans or Lucky Jeans, but the BKE brand is actually quite nice. Levi Jeans have recently begun making newer and better jeans which are more trendy, such as the skinny jean. My first pair of skinnies come from Levi, and cost me only $24. That’s a pretty good deal for a good pair of jeans. One of my favorite stores of all time is H&M;. Here, you can find the perfect jean for almost any occasion and they are really pretty fairly priced. There is always something on sale in retail…just look for the deals.

If you are a girl, I actually reccomend all the same jean companies, plus Citizens and Express. I know I work at Express, but for women, we make a really good, comfy, and classy jean. For the more feminine man, we also make a DPD collection for women, which fits remarkably similarly to those 200 dollar plus designer jeans I linked to above. These jeans are around $100, but it’s a nice hundred saved, and they look amazing.

I didn’t mean to be a Jean-freak, but I think that’s all I can post for right now. I love jeans; my boyfriend has gone as far as calling me a denim whore…what can I say, I appreciate some quality jeans. There truly is a perfect fit for everyone, no matter what size or shape. The tighter, the better, sorry guys and girls. If they’re baggy, they just make you look bigger than you actually are, so stop trying to hide your body.

Honestly, one thing I’ve found more fascinating than anything is the idea that if we wear baggy clothes, maybe people will think we’re less fat. This DOES NOT WORK. It makes you look frumpy, tacky, and huge. Wear clothes that fit. There should not be excess fabric in the wast, chest, thighs, or whatever. Unless you are looking at a silhouette which utilizes such fabrics. Babydolls are no longer maternity tops ladies…it’s ok to wear them.

Ok, that’s it. I hope this is better than that horrible fashion section in the daily by Mr. Leth. I’ll leave with this Rock & Republic fashion show. They are truly my favorite jean.